to be seen and to be loved as you are

is everything anyone could wish for and more

in the last few days, my friends have all assumed their own roles. i did not plead for them to step into these roles. but the moment they heard me scream, they leapt with full gumption without hesitation.

across new york, california, hong kong, london, singapore, jakarta and even australia, all from different walks of life. friendships have been a constant force of good since i was twelve. now at twenty-five, these friendships have only grown in abundance.

it all started with my friendship with W, where i got a taste of how life becomes far more meaningful when you have someone to share your joys with and fight your battles with. we were of pre-pubescent age, but he set the golden standard then and there. every friendship that remains in my life since then has only exceeded that standard.

i have always known that my friends are my biggest blessings. no shiny achievement could come remotely close. not even a big girl job in my dream city. but i also know another truth to be true, you can only know who your true friends at your lowest point. and you will be lucky if you even have a few.

so how does it make sense that i have an army of friends who have loved me even at my most unlovable? who held my hand as i cried and cried the same way they have filled my stomach with so much warmth?

i don’t have anything material to possibly offer. all i have is myself, my incredibly flawed self. i always leave my things behind. i burn everything i cook. i am so awfully blunt. yet they have managed to find me endearing, someone worth loving.

they say you can see your life as it is at your lowest point. at a time where everything is supposed to feel so painful, all i see is love, kindness and light. their love fills my heart with hope. so much hope that i am able to forget that apathy dominates our world.

every year on my birthday they remind me that they love me for everything that i am and all that i am not. they assure me that you impress with sincerity, and certainly not your possessions. that not everything is transactional and there is something in this world money can’t buy. that purity remains. that i can hold on to hope.