the case against self-improvement

also: how to stop consuming "productivity" content

hi! as we start a new month, i reflected on my new year resolutions. hope you enjoy it, you can catch me here :) leave a comment if this resonates with you, i’d like to know what you think

i normally start the year with resolutions. a long list of things i want to be better at. this year, my resolution is to just be myself.

self-improvement is a capitalism induced narrative: that we can only be happy and satisfied with our lives if we are at our best and most productive. with the pressure to see ourselves as a constant work in project, to fix and refine, it is no surprise that so many are unhappy and dissatisfied.

it is those very emotions that drive us to consume self-improvement and productivity content. when we do, we feel a glimmer of maybe when i improve and become this productive then my life will finally be good.

here is where it gets tricky. change only happens when you do. when you consume productivity content it gives you a false sense of productivity. listening, watching, and reading are passive acts of absorbing information. it can trick you into thinking you’ve taken action when you haven’t.

another consequence of it is that you see yourself as a work in a progress. i think a little dissatisfaction is good and when channeled properly, it serves as the fuel for ambition and growth. but without reflection and real purpose, it can trick you into living in a state of chronic dissatisfaction. haunting you with a sense that you are not enough.

this year, i want to practice self-acceptance and selective listening. but what does that even mean? does self-acceptance mean a rejection of self-improvement entirely?

i think self-acceptance is accepting that you can’t be the best at everything, and despite your best efforts you will fumble from time to time. when you do, you will laugh at yourself instead of beating yourself up. but that doesn’t mean you don’t try. you don’t try to improve at everything, just on the things you care enough about and applies to you.

self-help book paints the perfect person. someone who is always productive. when we look at overly photoshopped selfies, we instinctively know that they aren’t real and they set unrealistic expectations. yet under the guise that productivity is for the best, we unconsciously adopt these standards for ourselves.

last year i threw myself at self-help content like morning routine videos. i was promised increased productivity and improved mood. but after waking up before sunrise for a week, i was in a bad mood for the entire week. i am simply am not a morning person.

when it comes to self-help content and advice, i will take just what i need. if i am struggling with habit building, then i will read a book about it to understand what other people are doing right. i will no longer just throw myself at the self-help section. there are plenty of good advice, but very few that will actually help you. selective listening will do you wonders.

be gentle with yourself. remember no one knows what you need better than you do. so instead of comparing yourself with an unrealistic perfectly productive individual, compare yourself to who you were yesterday. it is the only comparison that matters.